Stacy (wakeuplovely) wrote in exmormon,

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Birth Control

For those of you who live in Utah, I am sure you are familiar with Robert Kirby, for those of you who do not have the pleasure of reading his smart-mouthed editorial I have included a link to his latest words of wisdom.

I guess that during conference someone (if anyone knows who let me know...)  made a statement about the church and family planning.  Something along the lines of:

"Having children should not be delayed or limited"  

When I was an active member I took pretty much anything said during conference as doctrine.   If someone said it over the pulpit it was GOSPEL.  Therefore, I felt obligated to follow the counsel, regardless of how it fit into my personal situation.

This particular statement I find outrageous!  With the technology and medical advances we have today it is ridiculous and in my opinion, irresponsible not to take advantage of them.  
Not everyone needs to have children!  Not everyone needs to have a dozen children!  It should be up to the individual, the couple to decide the size of the family, or whether the even have one at all.  

As I have mentioned in here before (as aredlife) I have a long history of eating disorders and other mental illness.  When I was at one of my sickest times I was told by an OB that I had a 90% chance of never getting pregnant.  I was devastated.  I felt that my SOLE purpose as a woman in the gospel was to have children.  The thought of never being a mother made me feel completely lost and worthless in the eyes of the church.  

Now, six years later, I have become adjusted to the idea of infertility, and have decided that even if I could get pregnant that I would not.  Now that I realize that motherhood is not my only purpose in life, I have different goals.  

I just remember feeling so bad, so wrong, sinful for not being able to "fulfill my destiny" and be a "mother in zion" etc.  I am aching right now for all of the women out there, who suddenly feel like they cannot choose.  I am angry at the church for taking away the right of a couple to use birth control and to plan their families.

This is so wrong.

Thoughts?  Opinions?
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